Friday, October 07, 2011

slight glitch in my flow back there, i am sorry for that, i saw it coming in my personal life and i needed to process the event and work out how to handle it and what it means for me. 
my friend is possessed. it is a tragic and horrific thing to witness and the devastation it has caused is just so pointless. the obvious move is to walk away from it but i have taken certain magickal vows to combat these entities and banish or bind them to me for my own purpose. yeah frought with danger i know but these demons don't frighten me anymore, i see them for what they are, entropy in the cosmic spiritual war. 


my friend is quite beautiful at heart, a really soft and wonderful being born into a great family, she is privileged, wealthy, has multitudes of what she calls 'friends' and i would call fellow parasitically infected, part of what i have written about as the zombie mass who are enslaved to alcohol, gossip mags, e bay and mindless gratification or escape without vision, hedonistic egoism and on it goes. the wise amongst you know the score.


her demon has controlled her since she was a very young girl, it entered her through an act i am aware off but she has blocked. it found a perfect host because it she is so resourced, money is never an issue although she will pretend it is, her parents fear her because of the demon, when i met her ten years ago her father whom i loved very much often told me how much of a positive influence i was upon her and how much he needed me to stay with her. i'm sure he told all her more reasonable boyfriends this, as it was a good way to be a father by proxy when your daughter terrifies you. obviously ten years ago i never had the full picture but i did have insight to remove myself and view her as somewhat damaged and ridiculous. 


she has a baby through a drunken night with another infected moronic zombie, the kind who thinks its a good idea to turn up for a visit to see his daughter drunk with bottles of alcohol. i dunno, it's all so fucking pointless and depressing when i write it, how dare these people have children, but then i understand the machinations of play, i see the cards fall and then through the veil i see the dealer. 
the spirit that infected her, the entity saw the end coming, it knows it has pushed the host to its limit and will now kill it therefore it requires a new host. she in her drunken haze once rang me to request i father a child with her, i rejected her.
it was only a matter of weeks until the spirit found a kindred spirit to produce a new soul to infect.
i assisted my friend through her pregnancy until she became abusive, i held her in my arms and let her weep until she embraced her consequence and found a certain happiness but i would not allow myself to be in the presence of her toxic friendship. 
so i never saw the baby born, i never saw poppy until mum asked me to visit her months later and the friendship resumed. 
and for a while it was good, until she started drinking. 
the consequences of this bout has freed me from her, i have concluded that she is lost, the battle is over for her, she has no future and there is nothing i can do anymore other than be true to myself and by proxy her, and name the beast. 
having seen her parasitic being for what it is my fear is that it has chosen a genetically predisposed baby to enter, this will occur in a few years, it's started but the baby's purity makes infection insidiously slow. this pathetic elemental fears me so totally because i see it now, all of it.
no wonder demons are represented by ugly images and representation, for indeed they are ugly forces and they are calculating and care nothing for anyone including it's host who it consumes in its greedy narcissistic devouring, sucking into all it's black hole those that actually love the host. (and i do love her) it knows in me it is defeated. recoils and revolts. my magickal ability is stronger now than ever, i can't be defeated. 
the other afternoon it asked me in its sick disturbing voice if i would 'father it's second child.'
the stupid beast clutches at straws. 
i will protect poppy as best i can but unless the mother gives me permission i cannot do anything for her, she is gone. a slave.
i have seen her probable future and it's very unimaginative.
my magickal weapons are drawn beast. you cannot defeat me, for i see you.









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