Monday, October 18, 2010

you unplug from the goddess for a moment, you wander around in your pure male form, you want to fuck, kill eat and sleep, your prime motivators are the sensational world, you have given in to base instinct, i love that feeling, it's been a long time. i remember it now, it all floods back, like the other side of the plug in your bath, the tree of knowledge fills your mind, ah fuck this you think, it's the impulse that makes you drive fast, it's the one that makes you eat fast, it's the one that makes you fuck fast, it's the one that wants to kill fast and run free, be lord of dominion, be unbounded and break all rules, all laws, all conditions, it's the one that knows no name, the one that knows no restraint, it's primary force is to just be the dominator, off all, you feel the energy, the power, it turns you on, you negotiate it as it flows into your blood, into your mind, into the space that surrounds you, quickly now bring it under control. breathing slow, you regulate the power, you take it outside, brute force bursting out through the seams, it's almost criminal but you have some power over it, discipline, 30 years of magickal training, you know what your doing. containment, it pulses under the skin, between my legs, beneath my surface, all prime red, base charkra, sex energy, it's back. this could be difficult, very tricky, as energy cannot be destroyed, it needs to be transformed. you think back through the female, tantra. but your more masculine now, undisciplined and potentially out of control. those fucking birds outside are freaking you out, you find your spud gun and start shooting, your dog gets excited. you need to combat the flow, redirect, reflect and then evolve it fast. discipline, training, breathing helps, soft the corners, ah yes, it starts to simmer. the furnace.
you wander upstairs slightly disgusted at your self, but really proud at this new love for living in the moment, you have no real care for your higher nature, except there's the higher nature at work, assisting directing your motives, 'don't succumb to brute force it whispers.'
you don't. it's all passive now. under strict guidance. the holy guardian angel says, 'take yourself into seclusion.'
you follow the direction, into your room, you work male energy, forming states externally, sacramental, the sacred or profane, the secret of real power and empowerment is you give it away.

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