Friday, April 21, 2006

being without my fin felt like being without a large part of my neo cortex, yes i was floundering on the verge of lizard consciousness, then one spare hour whilst in babylon i wandered into the surf shop, 'beach without sand' and found myself a beautiful translucent blue fin going cheap, as i explained to the man, 'this is technology at it's finest, it's the only example of technology that really makes any scense, it's the point in human evolution where we went wrong (coming out of the water) and now we are correcting it,' he listened to my ramblings as though i had just confirmed to him, my madness, but he took my money and i have a new blue translucent fin.

my blue translucent pod
makes me feel like a demi god
cuts the water slices space and time
sure feels good to be this divine
and little neptune and all his girls
come and dance in this watery world
like a drug from the amazon
my seretonin levels are aplomb
ah drifting out in the arms of love
with the gaze of heaven up above
one wonders things sublime
like this little ego of mine
and Poseidon and all his wives
swimming in and out, through our lives
yeah we feel so luminously entwined
in the presence of the numinously aligned
my blue translucent pod
makes me feel like a demi god

yeah i love my new pod, its a beautiful thing. out there the water was 23 degrees of pure bliss, waves perfect and i was thinking about emotional things, water being its metaphor and all, yeah emotions, the bane of human existence, what's old captain mission impossible have to say about them today.
well emotions are our instruments, they come with the hardware and just like the hardware they need to be calibrated. Calibration of emotions requires a range of experience, one can't just decide to control emotions, you need to explore their extremities, how far do they go, where do they become destructive, well it don't take a genius to work out that many a person is in jail for a murder they committed due to an uncontrollable rage, so we all have to concede that emotions can reach dangerous extremes but consider the emotional range you have at your disposal, let's explore all of them cos there's a lot but if you are smart we can split them into two groups, fear and love. the various other sub sections are just precision instruments, eventually you can just discard them and operate with the two principles of fear and love. once your emotions are calibrated, you need to understand why they exist, this is quite a simple process and although hard to follow intellectually, one can follow it intuitively. emotions exist because we give birth to them, lets choose a random one from the ether, for example, I feel jealous that my neighbor has a better car than me.
okay we can put this in the fear category, insecure because i was under the belief that the newer the car one possesses the more wealth and prosperous one is and to the monkey mind wealth equals power and status. so my insecurity gave birth to a jealous energy, a kind of being that has a life of its own, it often emerges and grows with each pang of emotion i feel when i see my neighbor's car. So now this jealous energy field is a massively powerful and forceful presence, separate from the real me, it is uncontrollable and i am embarrassed by it. So what does it want?
It wants to be experienced
It wants to be understood
It wants to be acknowledged
It wants to be loved
Once these four aspects of your friendly energy field has been exhausted then it will disappear. it has no reason to exist.
The formula applies to almost any emotional state. this little piece of 'mental technology' is like a little alogrithm for your brain to play with, try it, experiment, test it out, it works, free yourself, if ya dare.


after my surf i came back to mission control and had a long chat with the lovely sue c who moderates the church site and seems to know the band well, we spoke for about an hour at least and it was fantastic to chat with some one who feels the same way i do about this incredible band, we confessed to one another about how often we are just in tears when we see them, it's inexplicable and embarressing but unless you see such remarkable events like a church show then you can never appreciate the energy of what they do.
later i had a pleasant evening at planet autism, where i sang a few songs to my clients and a co worker, ahhh, i love my work.

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